all those

hugs and kisses and missing
make us lovers at most, or simply puppies.

there is so much more in a relationship.

once upon a time i thought we were able to talk
a lot, about everything. when i was most depressed
and when he was most depressed
we would be there for each other
keeping our hearts open to share whatever.

but that was just me. and he only happened to be there
and it happened that he happened to care about me enough to listen a bit
to my meaningless talks and silly agony.

i guess that was all. out of all things in the universe
i want us the most. but i have no idea how to behave around him anymore.
maybe my magic failed. maybe our magic failed.

maybe all i needed from us was that courage to stop being stuck in something i did not want.
maybe he was the little window i needed for my escape.

i have learnt to be independent again and appreciate the world now
without worrying about having to place a boyfriend before everything.

and i can write a lot about everything now,
without worrying that someone may get hurt.

i love life. life loves me.

it doesn't matter that i am unhappy, it won't be long before i am happy again.
i don't mind at all as everything i need is within me.
my happiness is mine. i am the giver and taker of it.